|Season||1, 2, 3, 4, 5|
|Occupation|| FBI Agent (formerly) |
Haven Police Officer
|First Appearance||Welcome to Haven|
|Relationships|| James Cogan (son)|
Nathan Wuornos (partner, boyfriend)
Vince Teagues (friend)
Dave Teagues (friend)†
Arla Cogan (daughter in law)†
Duke Crocker (friend)†
Jennifer Mason (friend)†
Mara (original identity)†
Lucy Ripley (Previous identity)
Charlotte Cross (mother)†
Croatoan (father) See More...
|Appeared In||78 Episodes|
|Status||Alive (as Paige)|
Audrey Prudence Parker was the second most recent identity of a mysterious woman, originally named Mara, who seemingly never ages and has gone by many names.
There have been two constants in her life no matter whose memories she has at the time: she always returns to Haven when The Troubles come back, and she always helps the Troubled. Nothing is known of her whereabouts during the periods between the Troubles, nor why she returns to Haven with the memories of other people.
She was "Veronica" in 1901, according to Mara. In 1955, she came to Haven with the identity and memories of a woman named Sarah Vernon. In 1983, she returned to Haven with the identity and memories of Lucy Ripley. In 2010, she returned again with the identity and memories of an FBI agent named Audrey Parker.
Searching For Her PastEdit
In June 2010, Parker was dispatched to Haven, Maine to investigate the death of escaped federal prisoner Jonas Lester, a local to the town. On her first day in Haven, the road she was driving on cracked wide open, running her car off a cliff. Parker was rescued by HPD Detective Nathan Wournos who can't feel pain. Wuornos brought her to a nearby crime scene, where Lester's dead body had been discovered and introduced her to his father, Chief of Police Garland Wuornos.
Parker also met journalists Vince and Dave Teagues when they showed up at a crime scene outside Hours looking for a quote for their paper, the Haven Herald. The Teagues later showed up at the Haven Police Station with a photocopy of an old Herald article titled "Who killed the Colorado Kid?" In the crime scene photograph accompanying the article was a woman who greatly resembled Parker. Parker, who grew up as a ward of the state wondered if this woman could be the mother she never knew.
Her first day in Haven she also met local resident and criminal Duke Crocker when he saved her life. Wuornos was highly antagonistic toward Crocker, but neither one was willing to tell her about their history.
Parker wrapped up her case when she discovered that Lester had been thrown to his death by Marion Caldwell with the use of seemingly paranormal abilities. After solving the Lester case, Parker called her boss Agent Howard, asking to use several weeks of her accrued vacation time in order to stay in Maine.
Helping the TroubledEditthe Troubles have a long history in Haven. Wuornos told her the Troubles were around when he was a boy, and then they left and he could feel again. He confessed that he has tried to ignore that the Troubles are back and was afraid that this time they wouldn't leave. As with the Lester case, Parker continued to prove that she had a gift for dealing with the strange supernatural things that were happening and the people who cause them. Chief Wuornos, citing her willingness to "see things as they are" as a valuable trait, offered Parker a position with the Haven Police Department.
Parker spent her free time trying to track down any leads on her mother. Chief Wuornos, who had been the detective assigned to the Colorado Kid case promised that he'd look for the old files. But though Wuornos located the evidence box from the case still sealed, the box was empty. Over the next few weeks she discovered that the woman was named Lucy Ripley and that a florist remembers selling her daisies, snapdragons and orchids. Though she initially had trouble getting used to small town life, by the middle of July, Parker was friendly enough with the local residents that they threw her a birthday party. Crocker takes this opportunity to tell her that he's the little boy in the Colorado Kid photograph and to give her a locket, that Ripley gave to him. He claimed that he didn't tell her earlier because he had no memory of anything from that day, something that greatly confused him.
At the end of September, Parker's supervisor, Agent Howard, demanded that she give him a reason for her continued presence in Haven. The explanation she gave involved her personal search for her past and her identity, and the confrontation prompted her to quit her job with the Bureau on the spot. She then joined the Haven Police Department in a full-time capacity, receiving the shield number 787396.
Searching for IdentityEdit
While helping James Garrick with his trouble, Garrick revealed that he knew Ripley and that she had helped him back in 1983. He told Parker that when Lucy helped him, she sliced her foot on a piece of glass. Parker, who had a scar on the same spot as the one he described, began to believe that she might actually be Lucy Ripley...
In October 2010, Parker and Wuornos were approached by a brunette woman claiming to be Audrey Parker at roughly the same time that the Plagues of Egypt began manifesting throughout Haven. They took the woman into custody, initially suspecting that she was Troubled. They also had to contend with the religious mania of Reverend Driscoll, who claimed that the plagues were God's punishment against "the afflicted." Parker and Wuornos ultimately cleared the woman, who then aided them in pursuit of the man responsible. When the backup that the other Agent Parker called for came in the form of an Agent Howard that looked nothing like the Howard Parker knew, and this Howard recognized the other Parker, the two Audrey's realized that she had this new Audrey Parker's memories.
With this information, Parker and the other Audrey set out to figure out her real identity. Parker continued working for the Haven PD, and moved out of her room at the Over the Way Bed & Breakfast and in with the other Audrey in an apartment Crocker was letting above the Grey Gull. Before they'd even finished moving in, the other Audrey loses her memories when she tracks down a mysterious barn by following coordinates that the mysterious Agent Howard wrote in the corner of a book he left with Parker. In the meantime, Parker has discovered that she can play piano, a talent that the "real Audrey Parker" never learned. Wuornos also revealed to Parker that he could feel her touch and that she was somehow immune from the Troubles.
In one of her cases, Parker met Chris Brody, a Troubled individual who inherited his father's popularity Trouble when his father passed away. Parker was immune to his Trouble and thus the only person who didn't agree with everything that he said. He took a liking to her, and they began seeing each other. After a particularly traumatic case where she got stuck in a time loop, watching her friends die again and again, Parker convinced Brody to go to London as he had planned to. By the time he returned, he'd gotten used to his Trouble and started to rely on her immunity to keep him grounded. Parker tells him that she can't be the person who keeps him himself, and they split up.
One of the cases that Wuornos and Parker caught dealt with a man who kept creating copies of himself; copies with the will to kill, something that he lacked. Parker found a way to bond with one of the copies and admitted her struggles with knowing that all of her life's experiences aren't actually her own.
After dealing with a devastating Trouble where Parker was forced to kill Reverend Driscoll to protect a little girl, Wuornos revealed that he had found Lucy Ripley. Parker kissed Wuornos, and then went to meet Ripley. Ripley revealed to her that 27 years earlier she had shown up and convinced her that she had all of her memories. Parker somehow hadn't aged a day since Ripley last saw her. Ripley also told her that when she visited twenty-seven years ago she was on the run. She had apparently discovered the origin of the Troubles and found a way to stop them permanently. But someone had died and she'd had to run, fearing that she would somehow be erased. A few weeks later, a man named Simon Crocker came to see Ripley, saying that he was trying to help the woman with her memories but she refused to tell him anything.
Parker decided to tell Crocker what she'd discovered since it was about his ancestors, and when she met up with him, he'd just discovered his family's ledger, which included pictures of Parker from 1983 and 1955 with instructions to kill her.
Parker then confronted the Teagues, whom she recognized in one of the older pictures of her. The Teagues reluctantly admitted that they did know her, as Lucy in 1983, and as Sarah in 1955. They revealed that every time she came to Haven she had someone else's memories and personality but she always helped the Troubled. Vince Teagues also gave her a ring that used to belong to Sarah, but refused to give her any more information about the past.
After working with Crocker and Wuornos to solve a case where the dead were coming back as ghosts and getting revenge on the living, Parker was preparing for a date with Wuornos, their first. But when she went to answer the door, she was tazered. Wuornos arrived at her apartment shortly after that, finding an empty apartment, signs of struggle, and Crocker's whistle.
The Bolt-Gun Killer and the Colorado KidEdit
Having been kidnapped from her home, Parker was taken to the Altair Bay Inn, where her kidnapper tied her up and interrogated her about the Colorado Kid, repeatedly asking where he was. The kidnapper referred to her as "Lucy" and told her that she wasn't the only one who loved the Colorado Kid. A fellow hostage, Roslyn Toomey, told her that the Colorado Kid stayed at the Inn in 1983. Parker managed to free herself from her ropes and call for help. Wuornos and Crocker arrived, and discovered Roslyn's dead body, but the kidnapper escaped.
Determined to get answers, Parker had the Colorado Kid exhumed. She found the coffin full of bricks and a note in her own handwriting that read "find him before the Hunter."
Crocker tried to help her learn more about the Hunter, and went to the Haven Herald to use their archives for research. He learned that "the Hunter" does not refer to a person, but to a meteor storm that comes every twenty-seven years. Both Lucy and Sarah disappeared from Haven on the night of the Hunter meteor storm, the same storm that was due to arrive in forty-nine days.
Having discovered that she apparently loved the Colorado Kid and that she was due to disappear in less than two months, Parker decided not to pursue a romantic relationship with Wuornos and purposefully pushed him away, afraid that her love for the Colorado Kid cost him his life. The person that kidnapped Parker and killed Toomey continued to kill. As the bodies piled up, the HPD discovered they were not only killed with a bolt-gun to the back of the head, but also had varying body parts surgically removed after death.
Parker began to remember bits of her life as Lucy, but Agent Howard appeared to her in her dreams and warned her to stop remembering. After this remembering became much more difficult and had a dangerous physical effect on her. She was however able to remember the Colorado Kid's face and his first name and she used that to identify him as James Cogan. Parker and Crocker then travelled to his home town of Nederland, Colorado to see if they could learn more about him and what might have happened to him. There Parker learned that the Colorado Kid was her son, that she gave birth to him when she was Sarah and that she found the Cogan family and placed him with them for his safety. She also discovered that her son was married to a woman named Arla.
With only 20 days left until the meteor storm, Parker and Crocker returned to Haven only to find Wuornos dead. They frantically tried to find the Troubled woman from the case he was working on, as she was capable of resurrecting him. While Wuornos was dead, Parker confessed her love for him but once he was resurrected she did not acknowledge this and pretended everything was normal. Wuornos and Parker then went to track down Tommy Bowen, who Wuornos had discovered is the Bolt-Gun Killer. They found him holding the Teague brothers hostage, torturing them for information. He stole a speedboat and escaped into Haven Harbor but the gunshots hitting his boat caused it to explode. Finding no body, they believed him to have been killed.
Parker spoke with Vince Teagues, who apologized for all the times he had deceived her since she came to Haven. She asked him about the Colorado Kid, and if he knew who his father was. Vince told her that Sarah never said who he was.Parker's remaining days passed quickly, dealing with a time travel trouble that landed Crocker and Wuornos in the past, a persuasion trouble that led to a dangerous kidnapping, a Trouble that put the whole town to sleep, and a Trouble that reverted people to their high school selves and then killed them.
During those last days, Parker discovered that The Guard, a mysterious Haven group connected to the Troubles, had problems with Ripley when she refused to leave Haven. According to The Guard, whenever the Hunter meteor storm arrived, it brought a Barn with it. She disappeared inside the Barn and the Troubles would end for another twenty-seven years. Only the last time, as Ripley, she tried to run away, and so this time The Guard went to great lengths to insure that she'd leave when she was supposed to. Parker also discovered that the Bolt-Gun Killer was alive, and a Skinwalker who could look like anyone. As the Hunter Meteor Storm arrived, the Bolt-Gun Killer, wearing a skin made of the various body parts she'd been harvesting revealed herself to be Arla Cogan, James' wife and Parker's daughter-in-law. Arla told Parker that when James died, Ripley brought him into the Barn to save his life and promised to bring Arla in as well. But Arla's Trouble was activated by her husband's death and when Ripley found out she'd killed a woman for her skin, she tricked her, leaving her outside the Barn.
Parker then discovered that her son, the Colorado Kid was still alive, that the Barn has in fact saved him. But Arla had gotten to him, telling him that Ripley had killed him. In an angry confrontation between Parker, Wuornos, and the Cogans, Parker had to show her son what his wife had become and convince him that she'd never hurt him. Wuornous also reveals to Parker that he's James' father and that he didn't tell her everything about his trip to the past. Angry that she's lost her husband again, Arla attempted to kill Parker, accidentally striking and killing her husband, before quickly being dispatched by Parker. As he was dying, James told Parker that the way to end the Troubles permanently was to kill the one she loved most. Parker refused to kill Wuornos, and instead said goodbye to him and Crocker and joined her son in the Barn.
Outside the Barn, a violent storm was brewing between Wuornos, Crocker, the Guard and the mysterious Agent Howard who was somehow tied to the Barn. Wuornos killed Howard, causing the Barn to start to implode. Crocker leaped into the self-destructing Barn to try and save Parker. Outside, the Hunter Meteor Storm had arrived, only, instead of passing safely over Haven, it was raining destruction on the town.
Escaping the BarnEdit
Working in the Oatley Tap RoomEdit
When Parker entered The Barn, it was too badly damaged to cycle ahead to the year 2037 due to Nathan's shooting of Agent Howard. It spit Crocker out, unharmed, into a Boston aquarium. But Parker was provided with a new identity and set of memories and kept trapped inside the Barn. Parker, who now believed herself to be a woman named Lexie DeWitt, was spending her days tending bar at the Oatley Tap Room, a facade created by the dying Barn.
Parker believed that she was an ordinary girl who had been working at the Oatley Tap Room with her new friend Rhonda for a month, when a mysterious stranger named William started to change things. William tried to convince Audrey that she was actually someone else. He had a man come in with a gun and threaten her, to see if he could provoke a reaction. When that didn't work, he had the man return with muscle, to threaten him. This triggered something and Parker, who believed she had never held a gun before in her life, was able to assemble a gun in seconds and use it to get the men to back off. Open to the possibility that she there might be more to herself than she thought, Parker held William at gunpoint, demanding answers. William refused to provide them, telling her that she wasn't ready and in response, Parker kicked him out of the bar.
Parker tried to ignore the strange things that had happened and get on with her job, but when she turned around, William was back at the bar as though he'd never left. When Parker tried to go home for the day, the exit to the bar cycled her back through the entrance, keeping her from leaving. Everyone else in the bar, including Rhonda, seemed to think that time had passed, than she'd gone home and returned.
Parke confronted William, and thinking her ready to believe him, he revealed that the bar wasn't real. That they were inside the imploding Barn. Parker accepted William's words as truth, and with it, all of the customers disappeared. And after saying goodbye to Rhonda, to whom she'd grown attached, Rhonda disappeared as well.
William continued to guide Audrey, getting to see the true nature of the Barn and helping her find the real door to the outside. He convinced her to take a leap of faith, and trust that her friends would find the door on their end and open it. Before leaving, William told her that she'd be whoever she most wanted to be upon landing on the other side, and that while he couldn't go with her, he'd see her again soon.
Butts in HavenEdit
Audrey tumbled out of the Barn, and recovered her memories from her time. She kept her memories of DeWitt, though they were fuzzy, like a dream. Upon landing in a clearing in Maine, Parker was surrounded by both her friends and the Guard. She shared a brief reunion with Wuornos, who kissed her, then demanded that she kill him to end the Troubles. Wournos told her that he'd discovered what Agent Howard had told her about killing the one she loves most to end the Troubles; that the Troubles hadn't gone away and that killing him was the only option. Parker looked around and realized that the Guard was there to ensure that she killed Wuornos, and decided that the best way to protect him was to pretend to be Lexie DeWitt, a woman who doesn't know or love Wuornos. === After this revelation, hell broke loose. Wuornos ran and the Guard chased after him, while Crocker fought them. Jennifer Mason, whose Trouble connected her to the Barn and who used this to find the door to the Barn briefly introduced herself to Parker before they had to chase after everyone else.
Parker and Jennifer caught up with the Guard before they killed Wuornos and stopped them, demanding answers. Seizing the moment, Crocker offered the Guard a way to end the Troubles and save Wuornos' life: set Wuornos and DeWitt free and wait for them to fall in love so that she can kill him. The Guard reluctantly agreed and Parker was assigned to work Trouble cases with Wuornos. Her disappearance, apparent lack of memory and odd behavior was explained to those outside the Guard as a case of amnesia.
Parker continued to pretend to be DeWitt, adopting mannerisms like twirling her hair to throw people off. She also said unsettling things to keep people from looking too closely and constantly came up with excuses for how she knew things. But in her first case back, she had to face off against Crocker when he was possessed by a boy named Tyler. During this confrontation, she acted too much like herself, and Crocker, who remembered everything from his possession confronted her about this. She confessed that yes, she remembered her time as Audrey Parker.
Parker swore Crocker to secrecy and enlisted him to help her keep her secret around Wuornos. Crocker reluctantly agreed, taking her place working with Wuornos, while she pretends to be busy with paperwork. Throughout the case, Crocker secretly updates her about a case, acting as her eyes and ears. But when a Trouble that has already killed three people marked Wuornos as its next victim, her act slipped, and Wuornos realized her true identity.
Jordan McKee, a high-ranking member of the Guard, became aware of Parker's true identity after successfully spying on her. McKee got to Paul Krebbs, the Troubled person Parker and Wuornos were trying to help before they did and hid him. By doing so, she hoped to use Wuornos' certain death against them and convince Parker to kill him and end the Troubles for good. As before, Wuornos insisted that she kill him and Parker refused, instead finding Krebs and fixing his Trouble in time to save Wuornos' life. After the Trouble had been solved, Parker confronted Wuornos about killing Howard, taking away her decision to enter the Barn and attempting to force her to kill him. She told him that she loved him, and warned him that sacrificing his life wasn't his choice anymore, but hers. He had taken away her choice because he couldn't bear to lose her and she was now doing the same. She also warned him not to let her identity slip, because she planned to continue pretending to be DeWitt to keep him safe.
Mara Emerges Edit
As of the end of The Lighthouse, when she tried to push William in The Door to get rid of him, his spark caused her original identity of Mara to take over Audrey. She briefly appeared at the end of See No Evil to stop Mara from killing Nathan. In Speak No Evil, when Nathan knocks Mara out, Audrey is able to come out, telling Nathan she is still inside Mara before Mara took control of her again. In Spotlight, Audrey returns while Mara is sleeping and tells Nathan to treat her like he would normally so she can fight against Mara and not disappear forever. Audrey appears again when Nathan tickles Mara, and she tries to warn Nathan about the Aether in Mara's pocket.
In Much Ado About Mara, Audrey appears before Duke when Mara activates a trouble in Duke, telling him it's not his fault. She appears before Dwight when he begins talking to her about the troubles and how he respects her. The guys bring Audrey out again and she begs them to not let Mara kill her. Although this alerts Mara, Audrey is alive and Mara pushes her down. In The Old Switcheroo: Part 1, Audrey comes out again at the Freddy when Nathan takes Mara on a case. She tells them about the body switching and not to tell Mara she is still inside her, in addition to Mara beginning to get suspicious. In The Old Switcheroo: Part 2, Nathan and Duke managed to release a reincarnation trouble on Mara and prevent Duke from exploding. Audrey is separated and becomes her own human being. However, the Crocker journal never mentioned the reincarnation trouble splitting a person, leading to the speculation that Duke released a trouble that can free Audrey's soul out of Mara.
Losing the Immunity Edit
In "Nowhere Man", Audrey loses her immunity to the troubles due to the split, meaning that she can be affected by a trouble. While working on a ghost related trouble, The Guard kidnaps Audrey and mistakes her for Mara but was rescued by Duke, who managed to figure out where they took her.
In "Chemistry", Audrey finds a ring in Charlotte's car that matches the one Vince gave her, which belonged to Sarah. Together with Nathan, she confronts the woman who, in return for the ring, confesses that she is in fact, Mara's mother. Charlote explained the she came to Haven to take her daughter away and hopefully undo the damage she has done.
In "Chosen", Charlotte tricks Mara and manages to merge her into Audrey, making Audrey her own self again. Charlotte claims that Mara used to have Audrey's personality. Charlotte soon puts Mara and Audrey back together, with Audrey as the remaining personality.
Whole Again Edit
Once again just Audrey Parker, Audrey has her immunity to the previous troubles back, but not the new troubles released by Duke.
Memories and personalities provided by The BarnEdit
The only personality trait that is unique to every version of Mara is her ability to see the Troubles for what they are and help people.
- for more about these memories and personality see the real Audrey Parker
Parker's memories and personality are borrowed from the real Audrey Parker. According to these memories, she was born Monday, December 7th 1981.[note 1] She grew up an orphan and ward of the state. She grew up at least nominally Roman Catholic as she received the sacrament of confirmation, taking the middle name of Prudence. She was a loner growing up, having no real friends, no one she would call for a ride if her car broke down. Parker considered Nathan Wuornos her first real friend.
In her third foster home, Parker learned that her foster-father Jack had been molesting her foster sister, Teresa. The night she discovered this, Parker hid in Teresa's bed; and when Jack climbed into the bed as well, she stabbed him in the neck with a pair of Mickey Mouse scissors. Jack never molested Teresa again, and the incident prompted Parker to pursue a career in law enforcement.
Upon discovering that her memories were not her own, Parker suffered an identity crisis, wondering if she was real, and what made her who she was. She even tried vegemite again, reasoning that her memory of disliking it wasn't hers and she might like it if she tried it again.
Parker's similarities with both her past identities and the real Audrey Parker have both been shown with callback lines. Callback lines are also used to show how that the chameleon had all of Parker's memories and emotions and reacted exactly as she would have.
In "Welcome to Haven" and "A Tale of Two Audreys", both Audrey Parker and the real Audrey Parker react to Wournos telling her not to reach inside her coat for her badge by saying: "Okay, what am I going to do? Pull out another gun?".
In "Sarah", both Sarah Vernon and Parker say, "Why do I always fall for the shy ones?" in reference to Wuornos.
Parker also uses callback lines when she's pretend to be Lexie DeWitt, to show that she's the same person under it all, unnerve people, and to excuse any smaller similarities between her Lexie personality and her Audrey one. In "The New Girl", she comments on Wuornos' Trouble the same way she did in "Welcome to Haven" saying "oh, tough guy" sarcastically.
- Mara - Original Personality.
- Veronica - 1901 incarnation.
- Sarah Vernon - 1955 incarnation.
- Sarah Vernon's ring
- Lucy Ripley - 1983 incarnation.
- L. R. locket - Lucy Ripley's locket.
- Audrey Parker (real) - Memory source and New Personality.
- Audrey's Relationships
- Paige - Final incarnation.
- In Sam Ernst and Jim Dunn's original pitch, Stephanie McCann, the protagonist of The Colorado Kid was the main character. ABC disliked the idea of the main character being a journalist because they're had bad luck with similar characters in the past. They suggested that be some sort of police officer, so Dunn and Ernst hurriedly rewrote the pilot and repitched it to ABC later that day. They named their new title character "Audrey Parker" after Ernst's daughter whose middle name is "Parker".
- ↑ Parker's HPD ID card has her birthdate listed as 12/7/81. Haven Parker celebrated her birthday before finding out that she had someone else's memories. She also quit the FBI and joined the HPD before finding this out, suggesting that Haven Parker's ID card has the real Audrey Parker's birthday.
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 1.2 "Welcome to Haven"
- ↑ 2.0 2.1 "Butterfly"
- ↑ 3.0 3.1 "As You Were"
- ↑ "Harmony"
- ↑ 5.0 5.1 "Ain't No Sunshine"
- ↑ 6.0 6.1 6.2 "The Trial of Audrey Parker"
- ↑ "Resurfacing"
- ↑ "A Tale of Two Audreys"
- ↑ 9.0 9.1 "Love Machine"
- ↑ "Spiral"
- ↑ "Sparks and Recreation"
- ↑ "Roots"
- ↑ "Audrey Parker's Day Off"
- ↑ "Lockdown"
- ↑ 15.0 15.1 "Friend or Faux'"
- ↑ "Business As Usual"
- ↑ "Sins of the Fathers"
- ↑ "301"
- ↑ "Stay"
- ↑ The Farmer
- ↑ 21.0 21.1 "Over My Head"
- ↑ "Real Estate"
- ↑ "Magic Hour: Part 1"
- ↑ 24.0 24.1 "Magic Hour: Part 2"
- ↑ 25.0 25.1 "Sarah"
- ↑ 26.0 26.1 26.2 "Burned"
- ↑ "Last Goodbyes"
- ↑ 28.0 28.1 "Reunion"
- ↑ "Thanks For The Memories"
- ↑ 30.0 30.1 "Fallout"
- ↑ 31.0 31.1 31.2 31.3 31.4 "Bad Blood"
- ↑ "Survivors"
- ↑ 33.0 33.1 33.2 33.3 "Countdown"
- ↑ 34.0 34.1 34.2 34.3 34.4 "The New Girl"
- ↑ Audrey Parker's HPD ID card
- ↑ 36.0 36.1 "As You Were"
- ↑ 37.0 37.1 "A Tale of Two Audreys"
- ↑ Random Fandemonium, "Haven's Sam Ernst and Jim Dunn"