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Volume 96 of the Haven Herald was released online by Syfy. It covers the events of "301", providing separate cover-ups for different aspects of Wesley Toomey's Trouble. The magnetic disturbances are explained by burst gas pipes, and the article includes quotes from Dwight Hendrickson. The crop circles are explained as the result of a high school prank. Both articles are written by Vince Teagues.

The paper is dated Friday, September 21, 2012. This is the premiere date of the episode, and not when the paper actually would have been published. The photo caption suggests that the events of "301" took place on a Tuesday.

3.1 301

TranscriptionsEdit

Haven Trashed By Burnt Gas Pipes
Edit

      Haven was the subject of mass confu-

sion yesterday when gas pipes burst throug-
hout the town. The event instantly precipi-
tated a string of explosive phenomenon,
causing objects of varying size to hurtle
through the streets of Haven.

      Ronnie, who asked to have his last name
withheld, was particularly baffled when a
manhole cover hit his truck, sparking a
head-on collusion. "There wasn't anything I
could do," the 23 year-old said. "The thing
just fell out the sky. Next thing I know,
my truck's hit."

Several similar occurrences throughout
Haven have led many to speculate on the full
impact of these bursts and the magnitude of
damage that the town may have sustained.
Further contention has arisen in regards to
what the cause behind the incidents may
have been.

      Local handyman Dwight Hendrickson
witnessed many of these events and offered
a possible explanation as to their cause. He
commented that "Haven is built of a fairly
old foundation, and these instances involv-
ing manhole covers can usually be tracked
back to something simple. Something like a
gas leak for instance."

      Hendrickson has been an outspoken ad-
vocate for updating the city's inner founda-
tions. He concluded by saying "I've told
them time and time again: the city's strong
as its infrastructure."

      It is yet unclear if there will be any last-
ing impact from the pipes bursting but
cleanup crews have been working around the
clock, suggesting that Haven will return to
normal before long.

— by Vince Teagues, Herald Staff Writer

High School Prank Breeds Paranoia
Edit

      A set of mysterious "crop circles" found in a field

near the Altair Bay Inn are nothing more than a high
school prank—not signs of an approaching alien inva-
sion—according to officials.

      Matthew Jones, 18, along with three friends who
Jones refused to identify, is taking credit for the prank.
His group snuck out of their homes and met it the field
to make more than half a dozen crop circles "for a
laugh," Jones said.

      "It wasn't meant to scare anybody of anything—we
were just goofing around," Jones said. "We saw some-
thing on TV about these guys in England that made
some crazy symbols in the middle of these corn fields.
Well, we don't have any corn around here, so we just
sort of cut the grass."

      Equipped with shears, commercial-grade weed
killer, and a gas-powered hedge trimmer borrowed from
his parents' garage, Jones and his co-conspirators spent
hours meticulously cutting think brush into intricate
patterns.

      The symbols, Jones allegedes, were inspired by
comic books, conspiracy theorists, and even an old cir-
cuit board.

      "Have you ever smashed up a computer and then
looked inside? It's awesome," Jones said. "With all the
wires and conductors and weird little pieces, they don't
even look like they are from this planet. So, we kind of
drew those, but in the grass."

Have Police Chief Nathan Wuornos, who discovered


(article cuts off here)

— by Vince Teagues

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