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Volume 99 of the Haven Herald was released online by Syfy.[note 1] It covers the events of "Over My Head", providing a cover-up for the publicly visible affects of Daphne's trouble: the flood on Poplar Street, the shut-down of the Haven Swim Center pool and the crab infestation. There is no mention of deaths caused by Daphne's Trouble.

Over My Head - Herald

TranscriptionsEdit

Clogged Sewer Main Floods Downtown Haven Street, Poisons Swimming Pool
Edit

      In a statement released earlier today, the

Haven Department of Public Works said that
a major sewage line which runs under the
heart of Haven was clogged by several
pounds of improperly disposed of animal
carcasses, causing flooding, backups and
other sewage-related problems throughout
town.

      Most notably, the clog led to a backwash
that flooded several hundreds of galloons of
water onto Poplar Street in downtown Haven
and forcing a car off the road. Ironically, the
flash flood occurred directly adjacent to a
mural depicting an underwater ocean
scene—a painting commissioned, in part, by
the Department of Public Works.

      "At this time, there is no risk to either
public health or saftey as a result of the
compromised sewage line." the statement
reads. "The obstruction had already been
cleared, and clean up crews were immedi-
ately dispatched to affected areas.

      "However, this incident should serve as
a reminder to all Haven citizens of the im-
portance of proper waste disposal. Though
it might be easy, in the moment, to simply
flush any and all waste into the sewage
system, irresponsible disposal can have
grave consequences for our entire popula-
tion. Rectifying these issues can be costly,
and come directly from the public treasury,
meaning we are forced to divert funds away
from worthwhile public projects to clean up
someone else's waste."

      The clog also led to a backup in an auxil
iary sewage line, forcing potentially hazard-
ous waste water into the public pool at the
Haven Swim Center. All training classes and
water aerobics were cancelled for the day as
the pool was completely drained, chemically
treated and closed for 24 hours per state
regulations.

      Rumors of marine life—including rock
cod
and a Porbeagle Shark—found swim-
ming in the floodwater and affected areas
have been completely dismissed due to a
lack of evidence. The Haven Department of
Public Works insists that strong currents,
sluice gates and unsuitable water quality
would make it impossible for any ocean life
to swim—and much less survive—within the
Haven sewage system

— Vince Teagues

Mating Season For Crabs Means Headaches For Haven-Ites
Edit

      Hundreds, if not thousands, of small, skittering crea-

tures have taken over remote parts of Haven in the past
few days, but it isn't an alien invasion—it's simply
mating season for many of Maine's crab species.

      "They're literally everywhere—I feel like I can't
cross the street without stepping on half a dozen," said
Bob Harmon, a Haven resident who has been particu-
larly troubled by the crab infestation. "It's gotten to the
point where I can't stop thinking about them—it's like I
can feel them crawling all over my skin. I know they're
not really there—they couldn't be—but I can't shake the
feeling that they're covering my entire body. It's unnerv-
ing, to say the least."

      But Harmon's fears are unfounded—the crabs aren't
after him, they're just looking for their perfect match.
Every year at this time, several species of crabs indig-
enous to Maine scurry from their seaside homes and
head further inland for mating season.

      The crabs will congregate in massive groups for a
few days during the annual rise before returning to the
ocean breeding grounds for the mating ritual often shift
year to year based on environmental conditions, and this
year the Haven outskirts just happen to the "land of
love."

      "I don't care why they're here, I just want them to go
away." Maron said. "Get them off me—get them off
me..."

      The annual mating ritual only last a few days, so
citizens—even those as troubled by the crabs as Mr.
Harmon—are encouraged to be patent with our side-
crawling friends.

NotesEdit

  1. This issue of the Herald is mistakenly labelled "Vol. 98", even though this was already used for the previous week's edition.

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